In praise of good men (and a bit of funny about the other kind)

In light of the recent gravity of the last post, I think a piece of my dating museum should be finally opened and shown to the public, admission free!! Lola, Ginger, and really any of you kids who can remember any stand-outs that should be put an exhibit, please notify me. Carlo, an acquaintance from college, who called me on the 4th of July 2011 and asked to marry me. For the record, the whole thing lasted less than Kim Kardashian and that guy from Minnesota. Barney, a wonderful (or atleast by appearance) Catholic man who went to mass daily. We went on a dinner date until he showed me his favor things to wear at Victoria’s Secret. Vince, a seemingly decent guy who bought me flowers right after my hip surgery. The night after we went to dinner, his cousin called me frantic because he was nowhere to be found--that is until we found him in the Aurora City drunk tank. And saving the best for last, Eddie, whom I met one fateful night out with Lola and the girls at the infamous Church. Eddie and I hit it off, had several dinners together and even attended Easter Mass together. Why I thought I might have found my media naranja. I was dancing on air the Saturday he invited me for brunch at Le Peeps, as we ate Denver omelets and kissed over orange juice. Yet, right before he passed the toast, he announced in a matter-of-a-fact way he had a bank to rob that afternoon. Check please! The point of this rather pointless article is that there are all kinds, male and female and that yes, it happens to everyone. Please feel free to share your misadventures with me, La Coja.

10 Ways to Know If You Have Spent Too Much Time In Mexico

You Know You Are a Long Term Mexican Resident When:



1. Your cousin/friend is named Chuy and you dont think 'as in Bacca, right?'

2. You follow the smartest neighborhood dog to cross the street

3. You genuflect not only at Mass, but outside churches and in theaters on instinct

4. You think the local things tourists find as 'quirky and quiant' slightly annoying

5. You are no longer scared to ride in the car with Mateo Cunao

6. It does not bother you that a policeman is holding a rifle and is texting at the same time

7. You know the words to horrible Banda songs...and even worse, it has some relevance to your life.

8. You see a "Day of Dead" altar with Coke and think 'they could be mine'.

9. You find nothing out of the normal with taking the kids to the graveyard for lunch

10. You stop noticing when someone parks a donkey in your parking space

La Coja 1- Porky 0

" How's my Crip? Pigs got you down?"


No, my hilarious friend Igo, I am proud to report this Coja is not in fact down and will be return to Mexico on Wednesday.

Cast of Characters Part 3

La Mortera and Harry
Sex in the City advice on love, friendship, and death



Ginger and Lola
Good Friends, Traveling Companions and Donkey Enthuses



Eddie and Adan
My buddies. Mexico's answer to Bert and Ernie



La Hermana
My sister who lives in an orphanage not to far from here. I am hoping Brangelina will adopt her
La Psicologa
What I would have liked to have been ten years ago. La Psicologa silently observes from afar.